Opa.

Here we are 3 years on, you're still gone and we're still remembering.
I never really been good at these formal family remembering sessions.
Something in me breaks - snaps.
So much has changed since you left.
Just so much change.
I don't deal with it well, obviously.
You were steady.

As each year passes I get this uncomfortable feeling that my memories of you are getting less and less sound. They're slowly turning to dust.
So maybe I just fill in the blanks with how I wanted you to be.
An exaggeration?  Maybe.

I do know you were kind. Slow to anger. Patient. Hopeful. Grateful. Took delight in the little things. Felt for the oppressed.

I don't know Opa. At times I wish you were still here just too talk to, take walks with. But your presence wouldn't fix everything, as I make it start to sound in my head...

I miss you.

I love you.

From my broken, messy heart to your transient, eternal spirit.